Lunch with Gwen

I may have mentioned before that Grandmother Holden never learned to drive. She worked a full time job at what we referred to as the knitting mill-a.k.a. Genesco-in Florence, a long way from Center Hill, especially for someone who didn't drive. She got up early in the mornings and walked downhill to the edge of the driveway to catch a bus to work. I don't think she ever considered driving as something she needed to know how to do.

Grandmother did not consider her inability to drive a handicap at all and for someone who didn't drive, she sure got around. She always went to work, she never missed church, and her Saturday trips to town were almost as sacred to her as going to church. She relied on Momma and Aunt Betty for transportation to places like Kent's Dollar Store, TG&Y, or Kmart.

 A trip to town usually meant lunch out and that was my favorite part of the Saturday outings. My love for shopping was topped only by my love for food. It was a real treat to have a burger and fries instead of the usual beans, potatoes, garden grown vegetables, and cornbread. It was during one of these outings that we decided to have lunch at McDonald's.

Aunt Betty was the chauffeur that sunny Saturday, but I had somehow convinced Grandmother to take me with them even though Momma stayed at home. Grandmother was a reasonable woman and understood the value of my opinions as she shopped for whatever she happened to need, so she was happy to invite me to join her. Yes, that is exactly how it happened. There were no tears, screaming and begging.

We pulled into McDonald's and immediately the other grandkids and I began discussing what we would order. Hamburger or cheeseburger, fries of course, and an icy cold Coca-Cola.  We had all made our decision, when a tiny voice from the backseat declared, "I'm not very hungry today. I'll just have a cheeseburger, fries, apple pie, milkshake and a coke". A rather large order coming from someone who couldn't even reach the counter at McDonald's. That was a proud moment for me, as her older cousin, because I knew she had been watching and learning the ropes from the very best, ME! It was a valiant but amateur attempt on her part to get some of everything on the then-skimpy McDonald's menu, but unfortunately it didn't work for her. Hahaha, she should have bypassed her momma and went straight to Grandmother.

Now, you may be wondering just where this is going or if there is anything of value to be gained from reading this post. My response would be: only if you haven't yet realised the value of female persuasion. If you can't drive and don't want to....get someone to drive you where you want to go. If you want to go to town with grandmother, tears work wonders. And finally, if you are the youngest cousin in the car and you want that apple pie and milkshake, take notes from the older and wiser cousin, who is happily chowing down on a burger and looking forward to a shopping trip when she could have been sitting at home.

Try My Shoes

One of the easiest things in the world to do is to talk about what other people do, or have done wrong in their lives. We all do it, some of us do it more often and get more enjoyment from it. I consider myself a little bit of an expert on this subject, since I've been on both sides of the fence, so to speak. I've been quick to judge and I've been judged. It's a tiresome job speculating about, editing, and spreading gossip. The only thing worse than spreading gossip, is being the subject of the latest "opinion", "I love her but.....", "I can't believe he", "Did you hear about"..."She said that he said"... "She's my best friend but"....."You mean you didn't know"......"Everybody knows"...."She should be ashamed". 


 A few years ago I called my Uncle Bobby to ask his advice about a question I had regarding marriage and divorce. My husband and I had both led sinful lives and we were both divorced prior to our marriage. We made the decision to be restored to the church that both of us had grown up in. The church welcomed us, but we weren't asked to, or allowed to participate in church matters (other than attending) because of our prior divorces. I called my Uncle Bobby hoping for some scriptures to help me understand the status of my salvation. He gave me the scriptures to help me understand that both my husband's divorce and my divorce were scriptural. I mentioned to him that I was concerned about what the elders thought about our marriage and he offered these words to me, "They can't say what they would do, because they've never walked in your shoes".


It's so easy to look at people and think the worst, especially if someone is grumpy or hateful. We can't all be cheerful and happy all the time. If I'm caught in the aftermath of a migraine or going through some crisis with my family, I could be a nominee for "grouch of the year". If I think someone has mistreated one of my kids, we can up that nomination to "psycho mom of the year" , but that's a different story. The point I'm trying to make is, we should all zip our lips unless we've been walking around in each other's shoes. Thank's Uncle Bobby, for the simple solution to a massive problem.